Has it really been 4 months???

I've been sitting here trying to get back into the swing of things with this blog but it doesn't seem to be easy. First off, I feel bad for having abandoned this place because it gave me so much comfort through some very dark times (Sparky and all). Second, I can't really say that life's been easy lately and I probably should have moved my butt over here and shared about it, since talking about it normally works well. But newp, stubborn German background prevented me from talking about the fact that I feel like I made a ginormous mistake moving out here to the desert. I DO NOT LIKE IT! I've been homesick since I got here. I don't know what I was thinking moving 220 miles southeast of all my friends of the past 20 years... Guh! And I can't really say Finley is liking it much either, understandably. So I've been *visiting* a lot with SB friends in SB. I'm slowly trying to inch my way back there ... hoping to open my own practice there and getting back to normal. I didn't realize how much stuff was going on in my head before I left Santa Barbara, pretty much all attributable to my own sense of unhappiness, and I didn't really realize that I would take my *stuff* with me. Normally, that's the problem with running from things ... you take yourself with you.

Well, another lesson learned. I can't really say I regret moving here, as it has opened my eyes and taught me a bunch, but I'd rather be back home now, where my friends are and where I have a sense of belonging. Here, I just feel out of place and awkward and my heart's not in it to give it a better shot ...

However, even though I may not be the happiest here, lil Finster has flourished and grown into an 11 month old, 17 pound bundle of terror, eh joy. He's got so much personality and wit, he charms everyone wherever he goes and generally is the center of attention. See below:

Thanks for stickin' with me my little eFriends ... I really, really appreciate your support and friendship.