I've made some "official" progress. I've been able to actually take Sparky's bed away, and I was able to give away his doggy ramp. Both things were incredibly difficult, and both things broke my heart a little bit. But I know it's the beginning of my healing. Most of his other stuff is still here though, locked away in the closet, to be kept for later when it hurts less to look at it.
One of the items locked away are his clippers. There are so many funny stories revolving around those clippers. When I first got Sparky he came with a big, thick Newfie-coat. Because he was so incredibly matted and stinky from the previous, neglectful owner, I had him shaved professionally. It was at that time that I noticed that our little furry friends are able to feel embarrassment. Hah! When he came back from the groomers, he didn't want to get out of the car. He was embarrassed and I could clearly tell. As a matter of fact, I had to drag him out and he immediately disappeared in the house where he would stay for two days, only coming out once in a while to do his business. By losing his coat he had shrunk about 2 sizes and I think he felt less of an alpha dog and more like a toy poodle. He was obviously upset with me and I knew then that my baby held a grudge. The trauma usually didn't last longer than 2 days, and by day 3 he was truly appreciative of all the weight lifted off him.
Anyway, the next time grooming was in order, I figured I could do it myself instead of spending 100 bucks each time. The result you see in the picture above. There were holes and missing patches of fur everywhere, but Sparky was a trooper and I think by posing for this picture he tried to make the best out of it.
I miss this goofball so much.
Oh Mareike, the expression on Sparky's face is priceless. What a fun guy.
ReplyDeleteIt is a weird process, this losing of our beloved sweet dogs and we all go about coping with it in similar yet very different ways. The morning that Cowgirl died I gave her bed to a neighbor's dog immediately. Clearly, a panic reaction, yet I couldn't bear to see her bed without her on it. I kept all her leashes and collars on their hooks in the mudroom (where they remain today). But her toothbrush and her last un-eaten chewy thing (she had lost her appetite) and her very first old puppy toy are all on a shelf surrounding a favorite framed photo of her. I have added a few little other trinkets over the last few months. It is a little memorial. Sometimes I even light a candle there for her.
Anyway, thanks for letting Cowgirl into your dream. I can tell you for certain that if she had met Sparky in real life, she would have loved him! She was a coy, little lady and she had a 'thang' for big boys and Sparky was definitely her type. She would have flirted shamelessly.
Take care and dream on...xo gina
Mareike, that photo is priceless and adorable! He looks like he's trying, so hard, to be defiant, but he obviously adores you.
ReplyDeleteI've always groomed Joe, and every one of my foster dogs, myself...it's a good bonding experience, good time to really get your hands on the dog and check them out, as well as them gaining trust in you. I have no professional training, just hands-on. Well, one time, I was grooming Joe, at our local self-serve dog-wash, and used the wrong blade on the trimmer...instead of a 10 3/4, I used a surgical blade an shaved a divot right down the middle of his back. Looked like a reverse mohawk! I was totally mortified but Joe, being the love that he is, didn't know the difference, thankfully!
It's funny how, no matter what, they can't be mad at us and we can't be mad at them!
Mareike,
ReplyDeleteSo great to hear more stories about you and Sparky. I love his expression in this photo - like, "seriously, mom, I can't believe you are doing this, but because I love you...." Absolutely priceless!!
I'm also relieved to hear that you are doing better. I know you will have many ups and downs, but am thankful you have found an outlet to express beautiful stories that bring back memories of Sparky.
All my best to you,
Bridget