So Sparkplug hasn't been doing so well lately. Approximately 10 days ago I took him to the beach for the first time in 2 years. He had a blast. As expected, he was wiped out after we returned. Spark has bad Arthritis, so trips like this are seldom. Anyway, I wasn't concerned for a few days, but by day 4 I just couldn't understand why he was still dog-tired. So yesterday it was time for the vet. I knew something was up (mothers always know!), and something had to be done.
The vet had warned me. Two years ago we found a tumor in his lungs after he nearly died from IMHA. The tumor at the time was 2 cm big, and after months of Prednisone for the IMHA, the tumor had actually shrunk. We never got a biopsy, because there wouldn't have been anything for us to do, and I refused to know for sure ... I just didn't want to deal with it...
So yesterday, after getting another round of x-rays done, the vet met me inside the office and showed me the results. There it was, staring me bold in the face. CANCER.
C.A.N.C.E.R.
Two big tumors, and an enlarged heart with some possible fluid in the lungs. You don't need to be a doctor to know what that means. The vet gave him 2 months. TWO MONTHS!!!
Meanwhile Sparky was walking and sniffing around the office, oblivious to it all, while I was sobbing in a corner. First thought: WHY???? But I knew. Lots of dogs die of cancer. He's 15 years old. What do I expect? But it's just, he is my baby, he's the sweetest dog on this planet. There is no other, and I don't want another. When he leaves me, the hole left by him will by huge. That's all I could think about that moment. Sounds almost selfish? Probably, but then I look at him, and the way he looks at me, and we're just THE TEAM. I don't think he wants to go anywhere either. He's happy where he's at...
Anyway, I'm rambling. Good news was, he is not in pain. Bad news, 2 months is too short. After we returned home and I did some sufficient sobbing (probably at that point 2 days in a row, cuz I had a bad feeling from the get-go) it struck me ... Who am I to throw up my arms and walk away. Absolutely not. I will kick that cancer's ass. I am not going down without a fight. I refuse to just surrender my sweetheart.
Research over reaseach ... the next 24 hours were hectic, all the while I was preparing for a law school final. I'm not sure how I ever remembered the material ... but I think I passed.
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